This year the clock rolled over, I opened up a blank document... and just stared at it.
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| WHAT HAVE I DONE? |
The story I'm posting is, in every way, a first draft. I'll write a chapter, wait a day and then give it a once-over to check for spelling errors or obvious clarity issues, but aside from that it's going straight from my brain to my fingers to your eyeballs. I don't think anyone is expecting brilliance. The best I'm hoping for is mediocre-with-the-potential-for-not-bad.
Still, I'm not actively shooting for terrible. In the past I've let my whims carry me through the story, particularly when I hit a rough patch. I'd make my characters contemplate their breakfast platters or wander into a closet and start talking to their shoes or argue with each other in straight dialogue until the rest of the story became a vast, white expanse. This would pad the story, getting me over the next word count hump and often it helped me push through whatever trouble I was having. I'd purge my mind, refocus and take advantage of the momentum my flying fingers had built up.
During editing, I could cut out the talking loafers or whatever and stitch the story back together. No one would ever know. But doing it this way, this brain-fingers-eyeballs route, I don't have that option. Because I want it to be the best onced-over first draft that it can. I want it to be, if not enjoyable, at least tolerable to read. So I can't go on tangents that don't serve the story. I can't skip to the fifth chapter halfway through the second. I can't write [THEY TRAVEL TO THE TOWN AND SOMETHING INTERESTING HAPPENS] and then move on.
And that's when I realized this is going to be a lot harder than I thought. I'm still going to do it, but I think if I hadn't made a big announcement beforehand I would be quietly backing away from the idea.
If you're also doing NaNo, how'd your first day/sentence go?
First sentences are the most terrifying thing to me. There is so much pressure built up around them. There isn't a single book on writing I've read that doesn't mention the crazy, unexaggeratable (look, I made a word!) importance of your first sentence and how it will make or break your story, how it will either draw your readers in or make them put down your book in boredom. And that's intimidating. So.... I didn't write my first sentence. I jumped into my NaNo-novel just AFTER the beginning, say 2% into the story, because it was the only way I could get past that terrifying blank document. And now I kind of don't mind the first sentence I write as the first draft of the actual first sentence. Except, if I picked up a book and it started with a Facebook friend request, I'd probably throw it in a corner (or a fire).
ReplyDelete... thank god for young adult lit?
Oh and also, I think you shouldn't be scared to use all your filler strategies. Because you can explain them here on the blog! I'd love to read them, and about them! Because I think that's what NaNoWriMo is all about, right? Writing a first draft in a month is different from writing a first draft, period. And it's interesting and fun to see how other people deal with not being able to let the draft rest for a few days while they come up with the best way to continue. Every day counts! =)
ReplyDeleteOne word, four syllables. Miserably.
ReplyDeleteI had the similar feeling you did, but with the added bonus of a nagging voice in the back of my head.
My manager at work claimed that 50,000 words was easy! In my head, I had an Ally McBeal moment. Her head was on the copier as I shut the lid muttering "Fifty. Thousand. Words." (I am not usually a violent person.)
So her nagging voice was there when I opened my fresh Scrivener text file and stared at the blank page.
And stared.
Today has been better, and I am slowly making progress. Good luck with your 50k journey!
Jynnipher